Why do we find change difficult when having the tools, resources, and time in the world ? This boggles me because I know I want to change but, I feel something is missing about me and sometimes I think to myself will this convince me to change?
That thought dances in my mind several times.
Yes that is it. Perhaps we are not convinced completely about the change. Nevertheless, how many times have we struggle with that thought?
“I need to change”
It may not be easy to change but it’s worth it.
At the age of 20, I was depressed, had health problems, major social anxiety, and didn’t really know how to make friends. It felt like being on a deserted island even though there were people everywhere. I wasn’t able to reach out to them and connect.
One day I made the decision to change because I realized the problem wasn’t other people, it was me. It was time to learn social confidence and start connecting with others.
When I decided to become an author, I knew that the story I wanted to share was a rather personal one, and I wanted to make sure what was captured in Finding Success in Balance was 100% mine.
For many years, I spent time worrying about the implications of any actions I took; “What will they think? Will they like me? What if I am judged in a negative way? Am I good enough?” These thoughts and questions were exactly the language that prevented me from achieving a lot of the success I craved.
If you think your life sucks, it probably does. If you think people aren’t giving you a break, they probably aren’t. If you feel as if you will never be rich, you are probably right.
Why? Your mind is that powerful. It will manifest your dominate thoughts into reality, whether you like it or not. Your life is only the sum total of your thoughts, and if you are not winning, your thoughts suck.
We get used to saying no. “No, I can’t have this.” “No that can’t be done.” “No that won’t happen.” Sometimes we get so used to saying it, that it starts to creep into our dreams, hopes, and opportunities to grow. Then suddenly you’re saying “No, I can’t be normal.” “No, I can’t do that.” “No, ’cause why bother?”
This is your inner monster. The beast inside of you that has nothing better to do than second-guess your every move. And this beast likes rewards, feed it money, food, alcohol, the end of the workday. It’s happy to eat that up, and be quiet for a while. Until you do something it doesn’t like, you do something that is new, unfamiliar, risky, personal, or important to you. And then it’s there, telling you how and why it cannot be done.
Whenever an event or an action does not go the way we expected it to go, we start whining and complaining about everything that is associated with it. If you look at yourself consciously, you would find that complaining comes to you quite naturally. Grumbling is the easiest thing you can do to overshadow your failure and if it becomes a habit, it will turn into a way of living. But in the process, you are falling in a vicious trap of negativity and ruining your life.
Here is an interesting concept that I have used ever since I can remember and that I have shared in my seminars for years. If you’re interested in setting a sizeable goal, I know it will help you too!
I want to talk about Fantasy, Theory, Fact. The basis for this concept is that everything has its origination in the form of a Fantasy, which some adventurous soul dares turn into a theory and then becomes bold enough to turn into a fact. This entire transition, of course, is the result of the highest form of no-limit, positive thinking available, yet, the cautious may construe this as erratic behavior.
“I can never stick to anything.”
“I know I should focus on one thing, but which one?”
“I lose interest in things I thought would interest me forever.”
“I keep going off on another tangent.”
“I get bored as soon as I know how to do something.”
“I can’t stand to do anything twice.”
“I keep changing my mind about what I want to do and end up doing nothing.”
“I work at low-paying jobs because there’s nothing I’m willing to commit to.”
“I won’t choose a career path because it might be the wrong one.”
It is not what happens to us, but how we react that makes or breaks us. Life throws things at us when we least expect, some things are great, others are difficult.
It is fascinating to watch the difference in peoples’ reactions and how some individuals can find good in basically anything, a silver lining in every cloud.
Others fall apart when difficult circumstances arise, believing they are being victimised and showing little resistance to the situation at hand.
There is no benefit of sticking to that warm and safe zone that is very comfortable.
The best way to achieve self-development is getting out of your comfort zone.
You will encounter new exciting experiences once you step out of your comfort zone. You will find freedom from boredom outside such a comforting zone. This article presents seven practical ways to break out of your comfort zone. Some of these ways are familiar, and this presentation will just be a reminder of what you know.